I guess I'll never understand...

Humans, I don't think I'll ever understand them. I think I'm done trying even. I mean, everything they do is foreign to me. They take baths every day, brush their hair every day, and they always seem to smell nice. None of that sounds very appealing to me. It's more fun to be smelly and dirty! But aside from all their strange habits, I'm baffled by all the things they do to us dogs. For instance, what's with all the nicknames? I've got a fairly simple name-Tag. Doesn't seem like you could come up with too many nicknames for that but yet somehow they do. I've heard 'em all; Tag-a-long, Tag-a-saurus, Tag-a-licious, Tag you're it, and my favorite, Bug. No idea how they came up with that one. Why give me such a short name if you're just gonna make it longer?

Oh, and how is it funny to stand me up on my hind legs and make me dance to that crazy music they listen to? I am not amused. It's embarrassing. Something else I don't understand-being quiet all the time. Humans, jabber all the time. I don't understand 95% of what they are saying but they talk all the time. Yet I am told to be quiet when I bark. I can't help they don't speak my language and understand what I'm saying. Maybe I just want to contribute to the conversation. I stare at them, dazed and confused when they talk to me but they just keep on talking like I understand. I guess they must think I'm interested in whatever it is they are saying. heh

I've come to one conclusion about humans. They're all nuts I tell you. If I didn't love them so much I think I'd pack up my toys and move out.

Well we survived...barely!

I still can't believe mom left me behind. I mean, look at this face. How could anyone bare to leave me behind? But she did. She went out of town without me last week for the first time. And the worst part is, she left Riley and me with dad...all by ourselves...unsupervised!! Let me just say, dad loves us but he just doesn't get it. You see, mom and Riley and me, we have a schedule.

6:30 am-I whine and she gets up to let me and Riley out.
7:00 am-She lets us in and we get a treat and a bowl of water.
12:00-1:00 pm-Mom comes home from work and lets us out. We get petted before mom goes back to work.
5:00 pm-Dad is home and he feeds us.
7:00 pm-After dinner mom takes us out to play or on a walk. She makes dad come too. Then we sit with mom on the sofa or play inside.
9:00 pm-We get a treat and go to bed.

Well I guess she didn't tell dad about this schedule because he was getting us up at 4:30 am to go out before he went to work and then he wouldn't come back until 4 pm to let us out! That's a long time to hold it folks. We had a couple accidents and dad seemed pretty stressed out when he got home and had to clean up after us. What else were we supposed to do? Also, he was tired when he got home and didn't want to play when I brought my toys to him. Now I know dad did his best to take care of us, but he just doesn't have the kind of patience and love that mom does.

I don't know what mom was thinking but we were sure happy to see her when she got home! Mom, please don't ever do that again! I'm just glad I'm alive to tell the story!